Perfectionism, my friend, is that constant drive we all have to be our very best, to nail everything we do with an almost superhuman level of exactness. It's all about setting the bar sky-high for ourselves and others, pushing us to reach new heights and achieve greatness.

But you know what? It’s also a double-edged sword. On one hand, it keeps us motivated and helps us be better, but on the other, it leads to self-doubt and never feeling quite satisfied. It's like a rollercoaster of emotions, combining inspiration with frustration.

What is perfectionism?

Perfectionism is the restless pursuit of flawlessness and excellence. It involves setting exceptionally high standards for oneself or others and striving to achieve them constantly.

While it can be motivating at times, it may also lead to self-criticism and a constant sense of dissatisfaction. Balancing the desire for perfection with self-compassion is essential for personal growth and overall well-being.

How did simple become so unattractive?

Comparison is part of the human experience. We’ve been unconsciously observing others to measure our progress for hundreds of years. Especially if you grew up in a culture and a household where you are not allowed to make any mistakes, perfectionism slowly becomes inevitable.

However, lately, perfectionism became an even bigger problem since social media became a part of our lives. With the addition of social media, no matter what we do or how we look we can never be as good as a perfectly created and edited picture that we see.

How does the pressure to overachieve affect us?

Perfectionism is a very destructive self-sabotaging pattern. With the pressure of perfectionism, not only do we move away from our authentic way of being but also we get stuck in self-devaluation. The more we chase perfectionism, the more we doubt our abilities, self-worth, and talents as a whole.

As a result, we may experience a lack of self-esteem, difficulty finding the motivation to fulfill our goals, and procrastination when it comes to taking action.

What are some of the underlying factors for rising perfectionism?

The biggest contributor that changed dynamics dramatically in this century is obviously social media. We get exposed to hundreds of people via social media on a daily basis. Unfortunately, we get exposed to their altered and optimized versions which leads to unfair comparisons.

Additionally, monetary expectations became more prominent in recent years making income levels, jobs, or even schools; making us more open to comparison.

How about any positive sides of perfectionism… 

A positive outcome of perfectionism can be striving for excellence. Perfectionism is destructive when we aim to be as “perfect” as others which is a goal fueled by fear of rejection, not being accepted, or not being good enough. However, when we intend to reach excellence within ourselves, the results can be magical!

How to get out of the perfectionism trap?

Instead of comparing yourself with others, if you compare yourself with your own progress, you can actually measure your success accurately and continue bettering yourself. For example, you can look at your life one year ago to see how much you came along in your journey. This provides a healthy foundation for further development.

Another tip is to see yourself as a whole. Internalizing the idea of “being good enough” starts with self-acceptance and self-love. Appreciating the great qualities we have while discovering the frailties we harbor is a great start.

Self-love starts with self-acceptance. We can start by understanding that part of the human experience is the imperfections we have. At the same time, these imperfections make us individually unique!

Wrapping up 

We can get ahead of perfectionism by limiting social media use, being selective with the profiles and environments we put ourselves into, and most importantly, becoming aware of perfectionism traps that are embedded unconsciously by the unique culture we grow up in. Awareness gives the power to do and be different!